Emotions

Hm.

It hasn't been any easy since then. Now I have come to understand how much he loves her, and I'm totally out of the picture. I sincerely give them my blessings. =)

After this incident, I cannot tell you that I have totally recovered from the injuries, but I am sure to tell myself that I shall NEVER EVER AGAIN be manipulated by emotions. I want to make a stand. I really want to.

I know that there are a lot of things which I really want to do, even when I have already made a stand, but sometimes, it's just couldn't bring myself to make my stands possible. Sometimes I find myself a sicko. There are a lot of things I've told myself to do, but I have never fulfilled it. I've been committing the same crime all over and over again.

One thing I'm very sure of, is that I'm very afraid of emotional injuries, being hurt by relationships, until now, I have phobia towards relationships. Sometimes I even try to avoid guys, out of no reason. Therefore, I shall keep myself away from all these things before I'm prepared to get hurt once again. Once again I need to remind myself, to not be manipulated by emotions, again.

I guess I still have this bitterness in me, which it's not going to be good in the long run. I need to forget. Forgive and forget. It seems true that saying is much easier than getting it done. However, I still need to try, I am still trying and will be trying. I know all these will be over in time to come. You know, I'm in God's hands. =)